The second thing to expect from your manager is feedback. I’m not just talking about performance reviews, although that is part of it. Inevitably, you will screw up in some fashion, and if your manager is any good she will let you know quickly that you did. This is going to be uncomfortable! In particular, for those new to the workforce who are not used to getting behavioral feedback from anyone but their parents, this can be a pretty disorienting thing to have happen.
You do want to get this feedback, though, because the only thing worse than getting behavioral feedback is not getting it at all, or getting it only during your performance review. The sooner you know about your bad habits, the easier they are to correct. This also goes for getting praise. A great manager will notice some of the little things you’re doing well in your day-to-day, and recognize you for them. Keep track of this feedback, good and bad, and use it when you write your self-review for the year.
Ideally, the feedback you get from your manager will be somewhat public if it’s praise, and private if it’s criticism. If your manager grabs you immediately after a meeting to provide critical feedback, that is not necessarily a sign that your behavior was terrible. Good managers know that delivering feedback quickly is more valuable than waiting for a convenient time to say something. Praising in public is considered to be a best practice because it helps the manager let everyone know that someone has done something laudable, and reinforces what positive behavior looks like. If you don’t like public praise, tell your manager! It would be great if she asked, but if she doesn’t, you shouldn’t suffer in silence.
There are other types of feedback that you may want to ask for from your manager. If you are giving a presentation, you can ask her to review the content and suggest changes. If you’ve written a design doc, she should be able to provide ideas of areas for improvement. As engineers, we get code feedback mostly from our peers, but you will do things other than code, and your manager should act as a resource to help you improve those things. Asking your manager for advice is also a good way to show that you respect her. People like to feel helpful, and managers are not immune to this sort of flattery.
When it comes to your role at the company, your manager needs to be your number one ally. If you’re at a company with a career ladder, sitting down with your manager and asking her what areas you need to focus on to get promoted is usually a good idea if you are actively seeking a promotion. If you’re struggling with a teammate or a person on another team, your manager should be there to help you navigate that situation, and she can work with the other person or team as necessary to help you get to resolution. This usually requires you to say something, though. If you don’t ask your manager about a promotion, do not expect her to just give you one magically. If you’re unhappy with a teammate, your manager may not do anything unless you bring the issue to her attention.
It’s great when managers can identify and assign stretch projects that will help us grow and learn new things. Beyond assigning stretch projects, though, good managers will also help you understand the value of the work you’re doing even when it is not fun or glamorous. Your manager should be the person who shows you the larger picture of how your work fits into the team’s goals, and helps you feel a sense of purpose in the day-to-day work. The most mundane work can turn into a source of pride when you understand how it contributes to the overall success of the company.
As you become more senior, the amount of personal feedback you get, both good and bad, is likely to decrease. You are operating at a higher level, and your manager is operating at a very high level. Expect the type of feedback to change somewhat from personal feedback to team- or strategy-related input. It’s even more important as you become more senior that you feel comfortable driving your 1-1s and bringing topics for discussion or feedback to your manager, because she is otherwise unlikely to spend a lot of time on this outside of performance reviews.