Contents

Preface

Part One
First Contact

1. People Power

The Benefits of Connecting

Face to Face

Why Likability Works

Why 90 Seconds?

2. First Impressions

The Meeting

An Exercise in Greeting: Firing Energy

Establishing Rapport

Communicating

What’s Coming Up

Part Two
The 90-Second Land of Rapport

3. “There’s Something About This Person I Really Like!”

Natural Rapport

Rapport by Chance

Rapport by Design

Common Ground

4. Attitude Is Everything

A Really Useful Attitude

A Really Useless Attitude

It’s Your Choice

An Exercise in Attitude:
Triggering Happy Memories

5. Actions Do Speak Louder Than Words

Body Language

Flirting

Congruity

Mixed Messages

An Exercise in Congruity:
Words vs. Tone

Being Yourself

6. People Like People Like Themselves

Natural Synchrony

The Art of Synchronizing

The Bully

Doing What Comes Naturally

An Exercise in Synchrony:
In and Out of Sync

Part Three
The Secrets of Communication

7. It’s Not All Talk—It’s Listening, Too

Stop Talking and Start Asking!

Missed Cues

Active Listening

Give and Take

Talking in Color

An Exercise in Tonality: Sound Effects

Lasting Impressions

8. Making Sense of Our Senses

Visual, Auditory or Kinesthetic?

A Self-Test: What’s Your Favorite Sense?

Tuning In to Sensory Preferences

Metaphorically Speaking

Sights and Sounds

9. Spotting Sensory Preferences

Sensory Preference Profiles

TV Giveaways

Pushing for More

Verbal Cues

Eye Cues

An Exercise in Spotting Preferences:
Brain Lock

An Exercise in Eye Cues:
The Eyes Have It

Ingrid’s Hard-Earned Vacation

The Big Picture

10. Putting It All Together

Where Do I Start?

Assuming Rapport

A Modern-Day Parable

Appendix: The Small Things That Make a Big Difference Workbook

About the Author