Fawn Continuum Of Healthy Relating To OthersCOMPLEX PTSD:
FROM SURVIVING TO THRIVING
TABLE OF CONTENTS
PART 1 — AN OVERVIEW OF RECOVERING
Chapter 1 The Journey of Recovering From Cptsd
An Example Of An Emotional Flashback
Toxic Shame: The Veneer Of An Emotional Flashback
What You May Have Been Misdiagnosed With
The Four F’s: Fight, Flight, Freeze And Fawn
The 4F’s In A Cptsd-Inducing Family
Poor Parenting Creates Pathological Sibling Rivalry
Chapter 2 Levels of Recovering
Key Developmental Arrests In Cptsd
The Developmentally Arrested Healthy Ego
Psychoeducation And Cognitive Healing
Recovering The Emotional Nature
Grieving As Emotional Intelligence
Grieving And Verbal Ventilation
Gratitude And Good Enough Parenting
Chapter 3 Improving Relationships
Cptsd As An Attachment Disorder
A Journey Of Relational Healing
Healing The Shame That Binds Us In Loneliness
Finding Good Enough Relational Help
Parentdectomy And Relational Healing
Learning To Handle Conflict In Relationship
Self-Mothering And Self-Fathering
Self-Mothering Grows Self-Compassion
The Limits Of Unconditional Love
Self-Fathering And Time Machine Rescue Operation
The Tao Of Self-Relating And Relating To Others
Chapter 4 The Progression of Recovering
Cultivating Patience With The Gradual Progression Of Recovery
Difficulties In Identifying the Signs of Recovering
Accepting Recovery As A Lifelong Process
Therapeutic Flashbacks And Growing Pains
“The Unexamined Life Is Not Worth Living”
The Emotional Imperialism Of “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”
PART II — THE FINE POINTS OF RECOVERING
Chapter 5 What if I Was Never Hit?
Theoretical Neurobiology Of The Critic
Emotional Neglect: The Core Wound In Complex PTSD
The Failure To Thrive Syndrome
Emotional Hunger And Addiction
The Evolutionary Basis Of Attachment Needs
Abandonment Stultifies Emotional And Relational Intelligence
De-Minimizing Emotional Abandonment
Chapter 6 What is My Trauma Type?
Healthy Employment Of The 4 F’s
Cptsd As An Attachment Disorder
The Fight Type And The Narcissistic Defense
Recovering From A Polarized Fight Response
The Flight Type And The Obsessive-Compulsive Defense
Recovering From A Polarized Flight Response
The Freeze Type And The Dissociative Defense
Recovering From A Polarized Freeze Response
The Fawn Type And The Codependent Defense
Recovering From A Polarized Fawn Response
Continuums Of Positive And Negative 4F Responses
The Fight Fawn Continuum Of Healthy Relating To Others
The Flight Freeze Continuum Of Healthy Relating To Self
Chapter 7 Recovering From Trauma-Based Codependency
Comparing Fawn Origins With Fight, Flight And Freeze Origins
A Definiton Of Trauma-Based Codependency
More On Recovering From A Polarized Fawn Response
Facing The Fear Of Self-Disclosure
Chapter 8 Managing Emotional Flashbacks
Triggers And Emotional Flashbacks
The Look: A Common Trigger Of Emotional Flashbacks
Internal vs. External Triggers
Progressive Trigger-Recognition
Flashbacks In Therapy Sessions
Grieving Resolves Flashback [Step # 9]
Managing The Inner Critic [Step # 8]
Flashbacks As The Inner Child’s Plea For Help
Flexible Use Of The Flashback Management Steps
Helping Kids Manage Emotional Flashbacks
Chapter 9 Shrinking the Inner Critic
14 Common Inner Critic Attacks
The Critic As The Shaming Internalized Parents
Facing The Stubbornness Of The Critic
Perfectionism And Emotional Neglect
Using Anger To Thought-Stop The Critic
Shame Is Blame Unfairly Turned Against The Self
Thought-Substitution And Thought-Correction
Perspective-Substitution & Correction
Perspective-Substitution And Gratitude
The Neuroplasticity Of The Brain
Chapter 10 Shrinking the Outer Critic
The Outer Critic: The Enemy Of Relationship
4F Types And Outer Critic/Inner Critic Ratios
Passsive-Aggressiveness And The Outer Critic
Refusing To Give Voice To The Critic’s Point Of View
Outer Critic-Dominated Flashbacks
Outer Critic Modelling In The Media
The Critic: Subliminal B-Grade Movie Producer
Watching The News As A Trigger
Vacillating Between Outer And Inner Critic
A Case Example Of The Vacillating Critic
The Critic As Judge, Jury And Executioner
Mindfulness And Shrinking The Outer Critic
When Mindfulness Appears To Intensify The Critic
Thought Substitution & Correction: Supplanting The Critic
Grieving Shortcircuits The Outer Critic
Defueling The Outer Critic Via Working The Transference
Road Rage, Transference And The Outer Critic
Grieving Expands Insight And Understanding
Grieving The Absence Of Parental Care
Grieving Ameliorates Flashbacks
Inner Critic Hindrances To Grieving
Defueling The Critic Through Grieving
The Four Processes Of Grieving
1. Angering: Diminishes Fear And Shame
Angering Helps Deconstruct Repetition Compulsion
2. Crying: The Penultimate Soothing
Crying And Angering In Concert
3. Verbal Ventilation: The Golden Path To Intimacy
Theoretical Neuroscience Of Verbal Ventilation
Thinking And Feeling Simultaneously
Dissociation Deadens Verbal Ventilation
Verbal Ventilation Heals Abandonment
Verbal Ventilation And Intimacy
4. Feeling: Passively Working Through Grief
Feeling Can Heal Digestive Problems
The Emotional-Physical Connection
Techniques To Invite And Enhance Grieving
Chapter 12 The Map: Managing the Abandonment Depression
Abandonment Depression Fear & Shame Inner Critic 4Fs
The Layers Of Dissociation In The Cycle Of Reactivity
Parental Abandonment Creates Self-Abandonment
Deconstructing Self-Abandonment
Depressed Thinking Versus Feeling Depressed
Mindfulness Metabolizes Depression
Somatic Awareness Can Therapeutically Trigger Painful Memories
Dissolving Depression By Fully Feeling It
Hunger As Camouflaged Depression
Separating Necessary Suffering From Unnecessary Suffering
A Swiss Army Knife Approach To A Flashback
Chapter 13 A Relational Appoach to Healing Abandonment
The Relational Dimension Of Psychotherapy
Relational Healing In Complex PTSD
2. Authentic Vulnerability “Realationship” Makes Healthy Relationship
Therapeutic Emotional Disclosure
Guidelines For Self-Disclosure
Emotional Self-Disclosure And Sharing Parallel Trauma History
Meeting Healthy Narcissistic Needs
Psychoeducation As Part Of Dialogicality
4. Collaborative Rapport Repair
Moving Through Abandonment Into Intimacy: A Case Study
Rescuing The Survivor From The Critic
Finding An Online Or Live Support Group
Chapter 14 Forgiveness: Begin with the Self
Chapter 15 Bibliotherapy and the Community of Books
Especially Recommended Reading
Toolbox 1 Suggested Intentions For Recovery
Toolbox 2 Human Bill of Rights
Toolbox 3 Suggested Internal Responses to Common Critic Attacks
Toolbox 4 Tools for Lovingly Resolving Conflict
Toolbox 5 Self-Gratitudes/ Gratitudes about Others